Woman Could Listen To British Guy Scream For Help All Day

Illustration for article titled Woman Could Listen To British Guy Scream For Help All Day

DENVER—Confessing that the rich sound of the stabbing victim’s Yorkshire-bred voice made her “go positively weak,” Genevieve Clare, 31, confirmed Wednesday that she could listen to the dying British man in the street scream for help all day long. “I couldn’t begin to tell you what it is about that accent, but my heart just skips a beat every time I hear him say the words “ambulance” or “someone” or “anyone.” It’s just ridiculously sexy,” said Clare, admitting that the Sheffield native’s lacerated, blood-caked face didn’t really do it for her, but the charming lilt in his voice when he pleaded for a doctor was utterly captivating, even though he repeated the request over a dozen times. “At first, with all his hyperventilating, I thought he might be Irish. He had all these cute sayings, too—how adorable is it to call it ‘a bit of raspberry jam’ when you’re bleeding everywhere? So understated and civilized. I can’t even imitate it—‘Dear God, I can’t feel m’legs. It’s gone all dark.’ No, much hotter when he does it. Oh, wow, I’m blushing, aren’t I?” At press time, Clare was straining to hear the rich, plummy vowels of the man’s moans as they grew ever softer.