Illustration for article titled Thanksgiving Conversation Devolves Into Just Stating Things Dog Is Currently Doing

PITTSBURGH—After two hours in which they discussed a variety of routine topics with waning enthusiasm, the local Halverson family’s Thanksgiving conversation reportedly devolved this afternoon into simple observations about what their dog was currently doing. “Hey, look at him now,” Jason Halverson said as Bailey, a 13-year-old golden retriever, shuffled from the kitchen into the living room and elicited multiple comments from the relatives, who sources confirmed had exhausted their usual observations about work, school, and holiday traffic. “Bailey sure seems to love that chew toy. He hasn’t dropped it since Ruth and Hank got here. He’s really wagging that tail. And now he’s just staring out the window. What does he see out there? Oh, look, the tired little guy is curled up on the sofa to take a little nap!” At press time, the Halverson family’s Thanksgiving conversation had reportedly devolved into speculations upon what their dog was currently dreaming about.


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