Pervert On Subway Won’t Stop Staring At Masturbator

Illustration for article titled Pervert On Subway Won’t Stop Staring At Masturbator

NEW YORK—Questioning what had become of common decency, passengers aboard a Brooklyn-bound F train expressed feelings of disgust Tuesday in regard to a pervert who wouldn’t stop staring at the masturbator in their subway car. “My God, this sicko’s not even making any attempt to hide it—he’s just openly leering at that man over in the corner who’s masturbating,” said subway passenger James Ellis Vogt of the depraved individual who, given his clear preoccupation with the public masturbator, was apparently deriving some sort of vile gratification from watching the complete stranger open his pants and begin vigorously rubbing his penis. “What’s worse is that this pervert keeps exchanging glances with everyone around him as if he wants to make sure we, too, see the person exposing himself and trying to bring himself to orgasm. Look, pal, maybe ogling a man as he rubs one out on a crowded train is what does it for you, but we don’t want anything to do with your disgusting little fantasy, okay?” At press time, sources confirmed transit police had escorted the pervert off the train and were asking the masturbator if he would like to file a formal complaint.