Illustration for article titled Man Spends Hours Surfing Internet Rather Than Dealing With Real Pressing Issues In ‘Harvest Moon: Light Of Hope’

WATERBURY, CT—Bemoaning his inability to prioritize actual responsibilities over online distractions, local man Harper Crawford reportedly spent hours surfing the internet Monday rather than dealing with real pressing issues piling up in Harvest Moon: Light of Hope. “Here I am reading through my friend’s Facebook page like any of this stuff matters, when I know for a fact that I have an entire harbor town depending on me to rebuild their businesses and fix the local lighthouse,” said Crawford, stressing that while there were few real-world repercussions if he were to exit his browser and log off of his computer, there were numerous people, including Soleil, Gus, and the rest of the farming simulator’s characters, who counted on his daily commitment to putting in the hard work of picking up his watering can and going out into the field to harvest his turnips. “The worst part is that even as I’m mindlessly scrolling through Reddit, I have this nagging sense that there are mutated strains of Angel Lantern building up out on my farm. For Christ’s sake, this island is the place I call home. What am I doing wasting my time responding to work emails?” Crawford also admitted that while he, of course, should spend some time in Harvest Moon’s Dog Racing Festival, he knew that all of this was ultimately just sidetracking him from the core issue of unlocking the Botanist skill set in Stardew Valley.


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