ST. PAUL, MN—Saying that he had reached a point in the relationship where he felt much more at ease, local man Greg Peterson, 32, told reporters Wednesday that he was finally comfortable enough around his girlfriend to cheat on her. “When we’d just started dating, I was always nervous about something going wrong, but recently we’ve gotten to this level where I feel totally at ease cheating on Megan,” said Peterson, claiming that it was a huge relief to have enough trust built up in their relationship that he could exploit it by repeatedly having one-night stands and random flings while on work trips. “Five years on, we’ve fallen into this great rhythm where she does her thing, I cheat on her, and everyone’s happy. Honestly, I feel kind of silly for ever worrying that this would be an issue.” Peterson added that he had always wanted to achieve this relaxed stage in a relationship, having seen it work so well with his parents.

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