OMAHA, NE—Calling it “impossible to ignore,” Burton Consulting employee David Shannon, 29, confirmed on Monday that the palpable lack of sexual tension between him and his coworker Lindsey Weis, 27, was driving him crazy. “The complete absence of mutual attraction is there—you can cut it with a knife,” said Shannon, explaining that the look in Weis’ eyes alone gave away her utter disinterest in him. “It’s torture. Every time we talk, there’s this subtext of her total indifference to me that I don’t know if I can handle much longer. I mean, how am I supposed to concentrate when this neutrality between us seems to be filling the whole room?” Shannon added that if the current situation with Weis persisted, he’d have to get transferred to a new department before nothing happened between them.