DENVER—Promising that it was really easy to get up there once you duck through the kitchen window, local man Alex Butler told his friends Thursday that you just have to climb a ladder, hop a 2-foot gap, and scale the wall to see the view from his apartment roof. “You won’t believe how great it looks up there guys, just hop over the neighbor’s fire escape, grab onto the gutter, and be careful not to slip when climbing over the ridge of the roof,” said Butler, warning that the bricks were pretty slick because it had just rained and nobody should lean on the rusted-out railing for support. “Just skip the sixth rung of the ladder, too, because it’s busted, and only a few people should walk across the ledge to the wall because it’s pretty old and you definitely don’t want it to cave in on you. But once you jump up, find the hole in the siding, and pull yourself over, you can see the whole city. I go up there all the time.” At press time, Butler had reportedly gone ahead and was last seen leaning confidently off the edge his roof, yelling down to whoever was back inside his apartment to carry up a case of beer.

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