Doctor Makes Half-Hearted Alternative Suggestions Before Handing Over Drugs

ARLINGTON, VA—Rapidly running through a list of non-pharmaceutical options that might resolve his patient’s anxiety issues, local physician Alan Caplan offered a series of half-hearted alternatives Friday before handing out drugs. “You could consider various lifestyle changes such as eating better and exercising more,” said Caplan, even as he uncapped his pen and reached for his prescription pad. “Some people try meditation to help them relax.” At press time, Caplan had fallen totally silent as he scribbled the dosage instructions for the anti-anxiety medication Cymbalta.

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