Illustration for article titled Cryptic New Laundry Room Rule Hints At Tale Of Bizarre Infraction

HOBOKEN, NJ—Pondering the mysterious circumstances that could have led to such a sign being posted, sources within a local apartment building said Thursday that an enigmatic new rule taped to the wall of their laundry room suggested a strange infraction had taken place. “It just says ‘Dryers are for clothes only’—what the hell happened here?” asked tenant Brian Mercuri, 33, who said the sign wasn’t there the last time he did laundry, indicating that during the past week someone must have done something “awfully weird” with one of the facility’s machines. “And why is ‘only’ underlined three times? Did someone try to dry a pair of work boots in there? Or a really big rug? Dishes? Jesus, would someone actually do that?” At press time, the sign’s original text had been crossed out, and the equally disconcerting words “Use machines at own risk” had been written in marker beneath it.


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