DANVERS, MA—Observing the potentially suspicious behavior from a monitor bay in the entertainment center’s control room, Chuck E. Cheese’s pit boss Lance Kessler reportedly told a floor attendant Thursday to keep an eye on a guest who kept winning big at skee-ball. “Our friend at machine 12 seems to be on one hell of a hot streak, so why don’t you head over there and make sure we don’t have any trouble,” said Kessler, adding that the attendant should keep close tabs on the child in order to determine whether he was using a weighted ball or some other method to cheat at the game. “Just stay close, comp him a free orange soda or two, and report back to me. Don’t try and confront him—I don’t want a repeat of last February when that kid got too handsy with Helen Henny and had to be escorted out in cuffs. Just make sure he’s clean before he tries cashing in his winnings for a giant stuffed Pikachu or remote-control car.” After learning that someone matching the guest’s description had won huge prizes at several Chuck E. Cheese’s locations around the country, Kessler had reportedly taken the child into a back room and was beating him with a phonebook.

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