MINNEAPOLIS—Shaken by the guilty verdict delivered in the trial of Derek Chauvin, local police officer Edward…

NEW YORK—Requesting the public come forward with any information they might have regarding the absolute bombshell,…

CHICAGO—Looking as though he was on the verge of passing out from anxiety, local man Michael Cookson was reportedly…

COLUMBUS, OH—Smiling while recalling the “fantastic little outing,” local woman Olivia Curtis told reporters that…

NORTH BROOK, IL—Excited at the chance to carry his plan to fruition, a squirrel reportedly couldn’t wait to ruin a…

BATON ROUGE, LA—Noting the phrase’s ubiquity as an answer to almost every uncomfortable societal question, sources…

VIRGINIA BEACH, VA—Arguing that the nation’s top earners shouldn’t be punished simply for being successful and…

YOUR LOCATION—Noting the complete lack of memorable details to help the date stick in your mind, sources confirmed…

POWELL, OH—Deciding to take the rest of the day off to recover, local sedentary man Clay Broderman was reportedly…

DAVENPORT, IA—Pausing momentarily upon glimpsing the oversized photo of smiling children skipping through a meadow…

SALEM, OR—Wistfully recalling the hours spent running and jumping around the machine’s high-powered, motorized…

SEARCY, AR—Saying he relied on a spontaneous, intuitive process he could not fully explain, a local man standing in…

APPLETON, WI—Stepping triumphantly forward to take in all things that are his on the glass shelves, local man Merle…

BIDDEFORD, ME—Beginning to question his decision to stock the handmade novelty water pipe, local head shop owner…

DAYTON, OH—Unable to determine the root cause of the child’s complete emotional ineptitude, local parents Josh and…

SPARTA, OH—Dismayed that such a beloved figure would risk tarnishing her image for a few bucks, local viewer Rodney…

CLAYTON, NC—Deciding it was better to be safe than sorry, local 25-year-old Michael Locke reportedly uploaded a…